2017 has brought with it a lot of new beginnings. For some, it is hard getting past the fact that something you have grown used to, comfortable with, or even hard-coded into your daily routine is closing so that another new opportunity may shine in its place.
"When one door closes, another one opens"
18 months ago, I may have been one of those people struggling with change. I would have become overwhelmed in changing my routine, I would have had panic attacks and I may have even run home and cried. It was a point in time for me when I was extremely vulnerable and lost. I had somehow allowed myself to succumb to others negativity and my health was, well declining. I had sat my parents and sisters down and opened up to them about my health and that I truly didn't know that my body would keep up with what I had in store for it. I still dreamt of being the "boss-lady", getting married, having a family, traveling the world, and simply put.... experiencing life!
I was careful to articulate that it was NOT ME giving up, but my body was not keeping up with me. It was one of the most difficult and scary conversations I have ever had to have with my family - but I felt that honesty was needed at this point - despite feeling as if I was tearing their hearts out and then proceeding to stomp on it just for the fun of it.
Since this point in time, I have spent a great deal of time:
1. By myself
2. Cleaning out and eliminating stuff from my life (old clothes, old collectibles, "stuff")
3. Removing negative people from my life
4. Rediscovering who I was, who I am, and who I want to be
5. Focusing on my health - that's right, I went the holistic, Ayurvedic, essential oil, yoga, breathing, sound healing route and I have to say.... get this.... it was the only thing that has shown me any type of positive progress! Why Can't America see the benefit of this health approach and start covering it under my expensive health insurance plan?
6. Reflecting on my childhood. Oddly enough, it had been a very long time since I was able to recall much from my childhood so I have been basking in the new memories that I have been gifted.
7. Making time for "ME"
8. Finding ways to stress less often
9. Determining where my anxiety magically grew from?
Where I am today
1. By myself and 100% loving me. I am comfortable with "ME". Even though there are times when I feel guilty telling others "no" and thinking about me for that random moment that I do.
2. Still cleaning out "stuff" and trying to learn from those minimalist experts ;)
3. Trying to find good people to add to my life
4. I am remembering who I was in the past, understanding that I am broken but on the way to recovery and I know that I am still a kick-ass awesome person and will continue to be in the future but instead of trying to mold myself into what I think I should be in the future, I am going to just unfold like a blossom and see what comes my way. I might catch some sunshine and flourish, or maybe a harsh winter will come and I will close my wings for a bit. Who knows? I do know, that regardless of what comes, I will never be defeated! I will keep a smile on my face and an open heart to myself and to everyone around me.
5. Still focusing on my health - it will be a life long journey.
I have started an at-home practice and I am loving it! The peace and joy that a candle-light morning practice provides for me, well it is my PEACE, my GRATITUDE, and my PRAYER.
6. Sharing my family memories with all :)
7. Setting "ME" as a priority.
I have been reading more, coloring, and studying things of interest to me (unique aspects of yoga, breathing, acupuncture, ayurvedic.... )
8. Stressing less often
9. Stomping anxiety down!
"When there is love, there is no fear. When there is fear, there is no love"
Where am I going?
1. Wherever the wind takes me
"Trust the light. face the darkness and live with the question."
Health really is a full circle of MIND, BODY, and SPIRIT.
As I find myself healing in each component of the circle - I have these ah-ha moments of, that's where.... the anxiety.... the sadness... the fear... the FILL IN THE BLANK came from. It is amazing to watch myself heal and become the NICOLE FIAMINGO I knew and know to be! Strong, beautiful and bold - in my own way!
2. Spending time with my family
3. Getting back into cooking
Here are a few of my favorite things:
Caption: Little Miss Priss. Even Play clothes were dresses and skirts. Hair was always long and typically with a bow
Caption: Rocking that Valentine's sweater and smiling from ear-to-ear
Caption: Having fun in the snow
Caption: I had just moved to a new city and Fran and I were ready to party!
Caption: Shopping, I remember loving to clothes shop.
Caption: Nana and I both Alumni at Keystone College, La Plume PA
Caption: Dad's an amazing cook and people admire his delicious creations. So I share with you today, three of our most treasured family recipes - Dad's Thanksgiving Turkey, Baked Ziti, and Nesco Mac and Cheese.
Caption: Papa and his little chickens cooking away!
"My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style." -Maya Angelou